No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.