"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Such a big mess for such a small penis
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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