That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
