I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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