dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you would pick up someone in the library
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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