I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
