I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
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Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
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And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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