apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Randomize
