Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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