I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Semen is not good for contacts.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
