I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize