Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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