Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
