I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
