You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
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I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
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It's official drugs can't kill me
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.