did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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