He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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