Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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