i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Houston, we have a blender
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize