508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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