More tranny stories later!
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
the day after is always just damage control
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
