she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize