Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize