Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
