brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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