craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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