is your mom at the bar?
Will you blow on my dice?
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
