at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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