Dual....:-)
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
