wrigley field is MILF paradise
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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