this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i came on her dog
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
