I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
