i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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