im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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