"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
