Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
