Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize