My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
please come you make the beer taste better
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
