It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
