I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
im holly from the hills drunk
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
