What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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