Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
