her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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