she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
