I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize