he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
