i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Randomize
