I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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