I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize