Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
What a dumb baby whore.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
